Lessons I Learnt When Life Jolted Me

By Diyaa in Experiences
Updated 11:02 IST Oct 15, 2019

   Sitting with myself and gathering my thoughts was one of the best things I enjoyed doing alone until today. Now,  as I close my eyes, I don't find solace, rather this incident that happened with me a week back keeps flashing in front of my closed eyes and shakes me up making me all jittery.

 

It was a not-so-perfect rainy day wherein I sensed my life being jinxed with a lot of things going out of their way. Starting with delayed flights to my destination, which took almost twice as long to reach, to not getting my bags on arrival, it was just signs all the way for me to be more cautious. I went for an out station wedding with my family where my kids and my bags out of the whole lot hadn't arrived. We had to shop for each day in hope of receiving the bags later at the end of the day. Somehow they arrived one after the other and I didn't know whether to be grateful for it or just accept it after spending so much more on impromptu shopping for the wedding. 

 

The day of the wedding ceremony arrived. My state of mind wasn't in the best of shape for all the chaos surrounding me. Something kept telling me to avoid going to the baraat and stay back in the hotel with the kids. Me and my husband were contemplating on this and we finally agreed to go for a bit. We waited for the fleet of cars to take us to the baraat. It had rained early that noon. The mushy roads made it all the more messier for us to walk. After waiting for our ride and getting into the wrong ones car after car, I finally got my ride with my babies. Not getting a ride also felt like a bigger sign, telling me not to go. 

 

The minute we reached the scene, the gorgeous lights, the fancy semi-royal setting of a baraat glued our eyes onto it. Elephants and the horse chariot made it look even more glamorous. My kids were so fascinated. As fate would have it me my kids and some family members sat on the chariot for our ride to the wedding reception venue. It took only a fraction of seconds when the groom sat on the elephant and we could hear claps and cheers all around. The minute the elephant rose, the horse shrieked and lost its balance. We all fell along with the horse. The whole humongous chariot fell from an almost eight feet height flat on the floor. A lot of them still hadn't realized this mishap as we were behind the groom. The claps stopped and the sounds of cheers now turned into yells and cries. All I remember was a group of people helping us to get up. I crawled a little ahead out of the commotion only to realize my kids weren't on my lap anymore. I shouted on top of my voice for my kids. I frantically searched for them. Thankfully they were grabbed even before I realized they went missing. My heart was in my mouth until I didn't see them. The next I know was we were being rushed at another venue, the hospital. 

We were all put on stretchers and taken to the emergency room followed by injections, fixed-monitor, x-rays and other scans. This was one of the most horrendous experiences of my life.

Like they say all's well that ends well. I give a countless gratitude to God for saving our lives and bringing us out of this in a very kind way. We were bruised and in pain but what counted was we all were alive and breathing safe. I give my sincere gratitude to each one who helped me come out of it smoothly.

This incident taught me a lot and here's what I want to share with all of you. 

 1. Everything happens for a reason

The more I thought about this incident first few days, the more I would curse myself for getting onto the horse ride. I was full of anger and guilt for not listening to my inner voice and going to the baraat. But when I see my boys hale and hearty I feel somewhere I may be the reason they are safe. They were on the ride with me but by God's grace, they came out of it unscratched. They must have fallen on me and maybe that's the reason I sat on it. I can't imagine not being there in the ride and they falling from it without me. I don't even want to think of the consequences. This made my faith even stronger and my guilt and anger smaller in front of it. God definitely has His ways and no questioning can solve the mysteries.

2. Time is the biggest healer

I remember lying down on the hospital bed in excruciating pain in my lower back as that's where I fell and hurt myself. My kids didn't leave my sight even for a minute. They were stuck on my bed with me all the time that I was there. All they wanted was to see their mommy get better and walk out of that place as soon as possible. I kept a smiling face throughout so as not to make them more nervous. I forgot my pains and the shock for that time. Even though they had been through the same trauma but somehow the kids' memories seemed short to me at that moment. They didn't talk about falling at all. But there came a time when I couldn't get that scene out if my mind's eye and I cried hugging my relative. She told me it was alright to cry and that we always didn't have to be heroic. Some damages are real and only time can heal it. I cried my heart out that night hugging her for a good ten minutes and I let time do its job.

3. Life is unpredictable

At one point you fly with happiness and joy and the next you know you are thrown down in pain and sorrow. Life is truly unpredictable. You never know how much time you have left with you here. Before your clock stops ticking make the full of it. I know to lie down on this bed straight for a couple of weeks till my body heals is not a very enjoyable moment for me, but all I can think is how I can make the most of it now and even later. I learned to never ever take life for granted. It gives us thousand opportunities to be our best and do as we like, we must grab those with both our hands and make something useful out of it. I never removed time for myself to watch a movie or a TV show all by myself. Earlier, I would somewhere wish I could relax and only do that for a change not handing over the remote to everyone around me always. See how our wishes come true? Only if I took out time for me in peace to watch my favorite shows rather than running around all day and silently wishing rest this wouldn't have come up. Don't wait for things to be thrown at you, accept them at the subtlest signs given to you. Make changes now. 

4. Accept life the way it comes

I laid down on the hospital bed in my pretty wedding dress, all eyes on me wondering what must have got me here in the first place. It made me very conscious and I demanded to be covered in a sheet as I was unable to move. Why my mind still worried about what people would think when what was more important was my life being jeopardized. I was thankfully discharged soon but due to my injuries, I was restricted from walking. I was put on a wheelchair for the first time in my life. Being handicapped was really not a good feeling. Not being able to pack my bags back for home, to not being able to dress myself up, I felt strangled in my own body for the first time. I knew there was no way out of this than to accept it. I gathered my inner strength and accepted all the people round me helping me do my basic chores. I have always been on the other side, but you never know when life switches places. I learned the harder way to have gratitude for the same. The whole journey to back home on a wheelchair wherein I got weird stares from people judging me only taught me to be more humble towards others in my shoes someday.

5. Life goes on

While we were at the hospital, the wedding still took place later. We were shuffling in and out of the scanning rooms while on the other side the processions still carried on. That was my first take on 'life goes on with or without you'! Of course, why should it stop for you? It meant the world to someone there getting married. It would have been the best day of their lives, something they must have waited and planned so much for. It wasn't anyone's fault that this incident happened. So why should the world sulk with you? Even when you are at your lowest, sitting in your corner, trying to face your fears alone, the world somewhere is running and at a good pace without you. Your family will soon go out and attend those essential parties or crucial meetings. Your friends will still shop and dance. The world will get to work the next moment and nothing stops. It's you and only you who is going to face this alone. So be your own strength and find peace in your own company for that's what is going to be with you all along. The sun will still rest and the moon will soon rise, so move on quickly and get above your pains. Forgive and forget it all. You give life a second chance. People who care will be around a day or two but life definitely goes on with or without you...

 

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Jyoti 01-Nov-2019 11:22

so true...life is short and full of twists and turns, some good, some not so good but we have to accept and face all the challenges thrown our way and very aptly said life goes on with or without you